Shatnerthonians: Day 3

We have a ton of entries today, and every one of them will rock your world. I mean that literally; your room is going to start to shake and then you’ll have to call 911. (Please leave your “Rescue 911” jokes at the door. Thank you. –Mgmt.)

As a reminder, if you have a submission you need to comment here or email me! Life got busy and I may not get to read blogs until July 20th or later (don’t ask why, it’s depressing), so don’t rely on me seeing your post when I make my usual rounds. There is nothing usual about this week! (And yes, I know this somehow showed up twice when it first posted. This time I’m blaming Blogger.)

But enough about me. Read everything here! I did, and I’m a better person for it.

* Andreas at Pussy Goes Grrr! writes about “The Devil’s Rain”, a movie that I just yesterday said I was kind of afraid to watch after hearing how bad it was. Now that I’ve read the post at PGG, though, I realize that I’ve seen pictures and screencaps of this for years. Also, allow me to quote briefly from the post:

“William Shatner does indeed appear in this movie, but alas, like Ida Lupino and John Travolta, he spends most of his time moaning satanic chants and not having any eyes.”

I now understand that it is my life’s mission to watch this movie as soon as physically possible.

* Bryce at Things That Don’t Suck accidentally watched “Star Trek: The Motion Picture.” Things did not go well, and I think he might have to change the title of his blog to Things That Don’t Suck Unless ST:TMP Is Involved.

* Ivan gives us more early television Shatner, this time from “The Naked City”. An excerpt of Ivan’s post:

Man! Ever have one of those days when you wake up with the hangover to end all hangovers—and then find your wife’s corpse on the floor of your apartment? (Boy, if I had a nickel for…well, this isn’t really about me, is it?)

Huh. Well it is now, Ivan. Just stay there while we alert the authorities I MEAN come over for a game of Pictionary.

* J.D. at Radiator Heaven with an incredibly good write up of “Free Enterprise,” not just a summary but a history, and a screencap of Shatner looking at porn that I just can’t stop grinning about. If the movie is half as charming as JD’s write up of it is, then it’s got to be a modern classic.

* The Floating Red Couch gives us his 3rd and final review (thus far!) for a Star Trek original cast film: The Voyage Home. What I love about this film is that any Trekker who hears the title of this film immediately utters these 2 words: Transparent aluminum! The Couch’s review wastes no time in this regard, not letting us forget that even though the crew was a bit long in the tooth by this time, dammit people, they were making transparent aluminum. You don’t mess with that.

* Tony at Cinema Viewfinder with a perceptive look at “The Outrage,” the 1964 Hollywood remake of “Rashomon.” Tony always has terrific insight into the films he blogs about, and posts like his are even more remarkable when compared to so-called reviews on sites like the IMDb. Most comments about movies William Shatner is in refer to him as “Captain Kirk” or, at best, qualify a film as being “pre-Kirk.” There is more to Shatner than Captain Kirk, and maybe posts like Tony’s can finally get that notion through to more people. One can hope.

* W.B. Kelso contributes the tarantula-and-Q-tip epic “Kingdom of the Spiders” at 3B Theater: Microbrewed Reviews. I had trouble reading this because AUGH SPIDERS YUCK, but the cap of Shatner with the Q-tip was so worth it. The last time I saw this film was when it was a movie of the week in the 1970s; I was a wee lass and less freaked out by cinematic spiders than I am now, but I am 99.44% sure that this movie is why I grew to be so arachnophobic. To this day I remember the scene where Shatner is covered in tarantulas. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA make it stop make it stop

* You can’t get enough W.B. Kelso or “Kingdom of the Spiders,” which is why W.B. posted a series of vintage advertisements for the movie. CREEPY vintage advertisements.